We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature - trees, flowers, grass- grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence… We need silence to be able to touch souls. Mother Teresa
Sick of eating. Sick of not eating. Sick of not sleeping. Sick of being tired. Sick of my body. Sick of my face. Sick of my mind. Sick of my family. Sick of being lazy. Sick of being fat. Sick of being uncomfortable with who and what I am. Sick of never accomplishing anything I try for. Sick of the misunderstandings. Sick of the lies. Sick of being helpless. Sick of being dependent. Sick of me.
my mom calling me fat just bc the stupid zipper doesn’t go up even though i have it on or not, is being a BITCH…you want me to loose weight, fine! just don’t complain that i’m not eating and that i look nasty completely skinny! you chose this mother! -.-
8136.) All I want is for someone to hold hands with and whisper secrets to. A guy that will make me laugh until I tear up. Someone that'll adore me and tell me I'm the most beautiful girl in the world. All I can think about is this somebody and when he'll appear in my life.
recently i’ve been going to church for my confirmation but i’ve been getting involved and i’ve been more into it and i think it’s such a great thing in life. i am a catholic and i love it. i wouldnt change it for anythng!
i guess alcohol isn’t bad especially when you know your limits. its not so bad to drink but just don’t over do it. drugs in the other hand are dangerous. you never know what can happen. maybe on the first pill you take or whatever, you can have the risk of dying. it’s not going to make you feel better. friends and family will (:
confession: i want to tell everyone i’m sorry. i want to have a day, just 24 hrs, to talk to several people. they know who they are. i do care about everyone. i try not to though because it’s not like they all feel the same. but okay, you are all just my friends, or maybe just classmates, but i have guilt inside of me that i’d like to take out and feel free from that. i miss certain people. i don’t think it was completely my fault, but i’ll take the blame for it just to get our friendship going again. it’s just something i’ve never really done before, and i hate that it’s something i have to type. i want to say it out loud, to each and everyone of you.
ten years from now i don’t know where i’ll be. i’m hoping that i’ll have a great home, family, and job. i hope nothing really goes wrong. im hoping i meet someone special and we get married. i hope i have a good paying job that i enjoy and i build a great house out of that. i hope my life goes in a good path and only God knows what’s going to happen till then (:
so i’ve been single since a few months now, i think. at first i thought things were always going to be dark after everything happened but my life is great. i actually love being single because i’ve met and talked to more people since then. i don’t flirt and all that because i think it’s wrong to do that when you just want to do it for fun or whatever. i have more time for myself, my family, and friends. before, my mom would always complain bc i was always on the phone or whatever. if i were to get late from school they would think i was doing something wrong, but now they don’t worry about that. i do think that liking someone or even loving them is amazing but its just not my time right now. and well since things aren’t so great, id like to stay single for another time now. i don’t see what’s the rush when i have my friends, family, and school in front of me. but thats how it is ;D
last night i had a dream that i saw Robert sitting down and i told him,”im so glad to see you one last time” then we hugged, gave him a kiss on the check (friendly way) and we both went our separate ways. i told my mom about it and she said that he knew i didn’t get to say goodbye and that was his way way of saying bye. i felt better when woke up even though thinking about him still makes me want to tear out.